?

Log in

YoakeYukai
06 September 2009 @ 12:42 pm
okay, so i know you guys don't want to hear me weep and cry over Jasmine, but i'm trying to get over it. Because i'm having such a hard time, i don't think i'm going to be online for a while. he seems to be the only thing i can think about much less talk about. So until i'm happy again, or well enough to act as if i'm happy i'll be away.
 
 
Current Mood: indifferent:'(
Current Music: Kaya - Silvery Dark
 
 
YoakeYukai
01 September 2009 @ 08:17 pm
So as i've heard.. Jasmine was cremated in one of his Hizaki Grace Project costumes..
it was said that he listened to Hizaki Grace Project endlessly before he passed..
also one of his last wishes was to see the night sky in Yokohama..
i don't know any more than that..
i just can't get him off of my mind..
it's been over three weeks now and i'm falling into a deep depression..
i think he meant TOO much to me.. i feel like i've lost so much. </3
Rest in Peace Jasmine.
 
 
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: Kaya - Silvery Dark
 
 
YoakeYukai
18 August 2009 @ 06:15 pm
I'm not over Jasmine.. it's been over a week... I just can't stop thinking about him.
He's my everything right now..
and i never even liked him so much..
i've always loved him, i can't help but love him..
but he was nothing near what i loved..
and grew to love him more and more..
and then it was pure love..
still not as much as others, but i couldn't help but love him.
and since i didn't like him so much, i was going to give it time because
i knew that the more i grew to know him, the more i would love him.....
and it was little by little, as i said..

i remember when i disliked him so much..
and the first thing i ever heard him say made me laugh and i knew he couldn't be that bad..
:) it was what made me first trigger my love for him.
he said, "i hate blue cheese! it makes me feel like an animal in the zoo."
^_^ too cute!!
and from then on, i tried to love him..
slowly so i wouldn't feel that my love for him was forced,
then i'd feel like it was fake :(
and that i just loved him because i loved so many others but him..
because i wanted to love him for real...
which i ended up accomplishing..
i watched him from here to there.. usually with the band though..
i looked up a few pics of him...
and it was slow, like i said...
i have their cd, their dvd...
i listened to it everyday..
i watched it very often..
and i've begged for more of them..
and i fell in love with their song Ascendead Master when it came out
about two months ago..
it was my favourite by them.
i watched it and played it so much that my niece and sister
wouldn't even come see me anymore ^_^
and i still love it..
but i've had the hardest time listening to it..
but my love for Jasmine was so much i couldn't even say at this point..
he was so beautiful..
still, i loved Teru, Kamijo, and Hizaki a lot more..
but Jasmine, i loved in a different way.

I love Jasmine so much...
right now, more than anyone..
and even before now, he meant everything to me..
more than my family....
which i know sounds messed up.. but i think it's my obsession i have with them..
yes, a mental problem, but one i never wanted to fix.. even to this day..
they're my life!!
and now that Jasmine's gone, i've lost a big part of it..
i don't care if it's been over a week!!
i've cried for him constantly!!
i can't quit thinking about him!!
and i'm so sorry Jasmine...
i don't want you to think i'm selfish..
i'm glad you're not suffering anymore..
but your life was way too short and i don't think it's fair.
you didn't derserve to die..
you made so many people happy.
i'm completely heartbroken without you Jasmine..
and i just can't apologize enough..
and i again, i really hope you understand..
and as of this point, all i want is to be with you...
and forget everything else.. Jasmine... Just for you..

*****
Guys, please, if you read this... don't take it the wrong way...
i'm not person to cause harm to myself nor am i one to do worse..
but it is the way i feel right now..
i can't believe i'm so down..
i've never felt this way before about anyone... :(
 
 
Current Mood: depressedheartbroken
 
 
YoakeYukai
14 August 2009 @ 05:15 pm
I can't forget about him..
this has been the worst week of my life...
Starting Sunday, Jasmine You of Versailles had passed away.
He may have not been my favourite of the band, but i really did love him.
I've cried all week for him
and yesterday i even ended up with a slight fever because of it.
i've worried myself sick over him...
but i just can't control my sad feelings about him.
I'm not sure if i've posted on here about my mental problem..
nothing dangerous.. unless it ends up that way.
i'm very obsessive.
i care too much for everything and everyone.
and my music was the greatest of my obsessions.
i love my bands, and i really love the people in them.
i'm all about them, but i do respect them.
i would never go stalking them or stuff like that..
i want them to be happy, even if it cause me to be sad.
they're like the children i've never had...
but i love them so much.. they mean the world to me.
Jasmine was no exception...
he, also, meant the world to me.
and i hope he's not looking at me like this right now..
i'm sure he wouldn't want his fans to be sad..
and i'm tearing my heart to pieces over this..
i wish i could be happy for him, but he was only 30
and i know he meant so much to so many people.
he wasn't just anybody, he was a role model, an artist,
a beautiful man who played great music and made us laugh,
and most of all.. he was a really sweet guy...
he made so many people happy.
I just read a while ago about what Juka wrote...
Juka said, "I hope you're okay, I'm worried about you."
and this really made me cry..
Jasmine said, "I'm sorry to worry you, I'm okay."
It's just so hard to live with this right now..
i never once thought that he could be the one to go next..
i've been dreading the day i heard news like this..
and it's worse, especially since i love Versailles so much...

~~
Jasmine, I love you so much!!
and i'm sorry for crying so bad..
and i'm sorry for crying so much..
i'm sorry that i'm so sad for you..
and i really hope you understnad....
you meant so much to me..
more than you even should..
so please forgive me Jasmine..
i would never want you to see me so hurt..
I'm sure you're having fun right now,
and having sweet dreams...
Rest in Peace Jasmine..
I will never forget you..

March 8, 1979 - August 9, 2009
Jasmine You.
Jasmine You Pictures, Images and Photos
 
 
Current Mood: sadsad
Current Music: Versailles
 
 
YoakeYukai
11 August 2009 @ 03:16 pm
I've been crying for two days now, but i can't help it.
I love Jasmine..
How can something like this happen??
I'm completely shocked..
i just don't know what to do without him...

REST IN PEACE, JASMINE YOU.
Jasmine You Pictures, Images and Photos
August 9, 2009
 
 
Current Mood: sadcrying
 
 
 
YoakeYukai
04 August 2009 @ 12:25 am
I finally finished adding captions to my Visual Kei DVD Magazine Volume 2 i uploaded on YouTube!!!
that took the breathe out of me just thinking about that sentence..
be sure to watch!! and if you see any spelling errors, please notify me either on here or on YouTube,
I'll be sure to fix in in a flash!
http://www.youtube.com/YoakeYukai
and visit the all new Japan Forum mentioned in the description!!
http://www.visualkeilife.forumotion.com/
and be sure to rate and comment on my videos!!!
Subscribe if you will!!

>.<
i still haven't turned my summer sleeping habits around for school..
which starts Wednesday...
or in An Cafe (Miku) language,
Wendsday! ^_^
Miku san wa cho kawaii desu yo ne?!
 
 
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
 
 
YoakeYukai
02 August 2009 @ 04:16 am
Okay, so i meant to put captions on my Visual Kei DVD Magazine videos i uploaded on YouTube before i uploaded them..
well, i forgot..
((i'm not very surprised))
so i just figured out how to add the captions ((English!!))
and i'm in the process of adding them ^_^
i only have the first three vidoes as of now, but soon hopefully
all eight parts will be finished...
a user commented saying SMILE was the funniest of the three..
((did you hear, they've disbanded as of January 07, 2009))
(;_;) *horribly sad*
They're talking about Sushi, the culture of Japan..
**ThE GrEeN tEa PaRt Is CuTe** >.<
so here's SMILE!!
well, after Chariots performance and Miku and Biju's intermission ^_^
((REMEMBER TO CLICK THE HQ BUTTON!! AND VIEW THE REST OF VISUAL KEI DVD MAGAZINE VOLUME 2 AT http://www.youtube.com/YoakeYukai))
 
 
Current Mood: calmcalm
 
 
YoakeYukai
01 August 2009 @ 03:34 am
Okay, i've uploaded the Visual Kei DVD Magazine Volume 2 to YouTube!!!
there are 8 parts featuring
Himeichigo, Chariots, SMILE, Mana's Not Dead, SuG, Moi dix Mois, Mix Speaker's, Inc. and SaTaN!!
they're all really great bands,
so if you haven't heard of them, or you love them enough to watch anyway
(that'd be me!!)
then go on ahead!!
http://www.youtube.com/YoakeYukai
Enjoy!
 
 
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
 
 
YoakeYukai
01 August 2009 @ 03:26 am
okay, well, as i just found out..
((sorry, i guess i haven't spent enough time on here yet))
when someone replies to your comments on their journal,
you dont know unless you either check your email, or
check the post again... o.O??
or am i the only one this happens to?
well, idk but i don't like that very much..
>.< i don't check my email very often!!!
Thiturday is the new Saturday!!
(*(just ask my Bou-chan!!)*)
 
 
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
 
 
YoakeYukai
31 July 2009 @ 02:05 am
I just bought D'espairsRay's new album!!!
((i've typed that so many times in these last few mins, you can't even imagine!!))
But it's really good!!
so check your local hot topic stores and buy it now!!! ^_^
Here's the 8th track on the album, Horizon PV

Enjoy!!!
 
 
Current Mood: bouncybouncy